What Happens When Old Ladies See a Kendo Match
by ForgottenKaze
Summary: A Sesshoumaru vs Inuyasha oneshot based on a true story.  Hints of InuKag, SessKagura, and BankotsuJakotsu


This random little oneshot is based on something that really happened to my father and uncle. I thought it might be good for an Inuyasha vs. Sesshoumaru fic.

I own nothing. Not even the plot.

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"I bet I could beat you in a kendo match!" Inuyasha exclaimed to his brother. Sesshoumaru glared at him over the book he was reading.

"I believe I've beaten you in every sport and martial art we know. But if you truly must be beaten once more, I could manage a break from this book," the elder of the two brothers replied in a bored sort of voice as he put down his book, _Sengoku-o Toki Zoshi. _"But you must get the dojo ready."

Inuyasha hurried off.

Five minutes later, both Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were ready, wearing all the appropriate gear and holding their wooden swords. They attacked. Each flew at the other, rage and brotherly hate fuelling their attacks.

After about ten minutes, if they hadn't been concentrating so hard on pounding each other into the floor, they would have heard the sounds of sirens in the distance. A very short time later, two cops, a reporter and an old lady came up. The two fighting boys were hardly conscious of their arrival, even when the shorter of the two cops, a young teen with long black hair in a braid, blue eyes, and a cross on his forehead rapped on the side of an open door.

"Would you two calm down, shut up and listen?" demanded the young officer. _That_ got their attention.

Inuyasha whirled. "Hey Bankotsu. Wanna fight?" he snarled. Bankotsu smirked.

"Do not turn your back on an enemy!" Sesshoumaru exclaimed, guiding his sword in a wide arc and hitting Inuyasha's shoulder. Had the swords been real, the younger brother would have had a nasty, almost irreversible wound. Instead, Sesshoumaru's blow had only severely bruised his brother.

"Why you!" Inuyasha leapt back into battle with his brother, but before he could complete his down sweep, the tip of his sword was caught from someone behind him. Inuyasha looked up to see the other cop, who was about a head taller than the hanyou.

"Would you two please clam down?" the taller cop, Jakotsu, asked. "You're disturbing the peace."

"Keh! Let me finish off the bastard and _then_ you can have your precious peace!" Inuyasha exclaimed angrily.

"You're right… Who gives a damn about peace?!" Jakotsu replied in a very un-police-officer-like way. Without warning, he randomly leapt into battle, fighting with his fists and a whip he seemingly produced from nowhere.

Bankotsu, instead of doing the smart thing, and his job, ran into the fight to help Jakotsu.

The reporter scratched her head and closed her eyes at the four idiots' behaviour and the old woman stared at them and muttered something about kids in the old days…

"Hey, Abi!" a black haired girl called out from the front of the dojo. She and two other girls came up to where the fight was taking place.

"Hey Kagome, Sango, Kagura," Abi, the reporter, called as the three girls approached.

"What's going on?" Sango, one of the other girls, asked.

Abi sighed. "Kaede-oba-chan called the police when she saw Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru fighting. Bankotsu, Jakotsu and I were called here. They came for their job, me for mine. And you know what happens when Jakotsu and Inuyasha meet, so he got in a fight with the two other morons and Bankotsu joined him…" Abi shrugged and the three others nodded. They knew all too well what happened when either Jakotsu or Bankotsu and Inuyasha met.

"Should we bother to separate them?" asked Kagome. Again, Abi shrugged. Kagura, ever the feisty one, went up to them and pulled them apart. She grabbed Sesshoumaru by the back of his shirt.

"_You_ are coming with me mister," she snapped to Sesshoumaru as she dragged him away.

Kagome and Sango did the same to Inuyasha, who still wanted to kill Bankotsu, even if they were both half-dead.

"Are you two going? Or do I have to call your superiors?" Abi growled at the two cops. Both looked up kind of meekly. They both scurried off to some other job at the reporter's death glare.

Abi then turned to Kaede. "Wanna go get coffee or something? My treat," she asked the old woman.

Kaede shrugged. "If Starbucks is okay with you."

Abi nodded and she and Kaede went off to the nearest Starbucks.

00000 00000

In a room just off the dojo, Inutaisho hugged his knees.

"Why must Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru always fight and get in so much trouble?" he murmured.

Izayoi looked up from her sewing. "They're your sons," she replied simply.

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Okay, the police and a reporter coming at the call of an old lady actually happened. And my dad and 'Q-ball' were actually fighting on their parents' front lawn and not in a dojo. I'm sorry if it was too short.

Review people! You get cookies!


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